The Trouble With Haiti

As most of you know by now there is somewhat of a crisis in Haiti. The official RoK stand? Who cares. Seriously, why should any person give a damn about this? On January 11th hardly anyone knew Haiti was even there. On the 12th that of course changed because a few of the shacks in Haiti were knocked down. Now everyone in America finally notices this little island slum and starts writing checks to help out the poor, poor Haitians.

The American people really need other shit to do in their lives. The social programming of this country is revolting. Most every American needs something to feel bad or guilty about these days. Thankfully the media is there to give that fix in whatever form possible. Whether is it the Haitians, a group of school children get mowed down by a gunman, environmental causes, whatever. As long as the American people can feel guilty about something or feel some socially programmed grief, their little lives are complete. But, that is only half of the all important equation. To complete the cycle after a certain amount of guilt or grief over events that do not affect our lives in the slightest way takes place we need to feel better about ourselves. The rollercoaster ride isn’t complete unless we can come back up again and get ready for the next drop. So to complete the other half of this ride and come back up, Americans are told who to give money to so they can feel better about themselves again. By giving money to various organizations and causes these jackasses can move on with their lives and feel a little better about themselves because “they helped out”.

So to start off the Feelgoodathon, Michelle Obama gets her TV time in by using tax payer dollars to get her own commercial then asks tax paying Americans to send $10 to the Red Cross. Yeah, like we all have cash just growing out of our asses. Not only did we just pay for her fucking commercial, we now need to send 10 of our hard earned dollars to a country that was a shithole to begin with. Then of course there was that ridiculous celebrity TV marathon where Hollywood’s best is there to make sure that those of us who still aren’t convinced soon will be. Hell, call in and maybe you can talk to Steven Spielberg! Ooooh, I am about to wet myself with joy.

I briefly saw a few minutes of this crap and was able to catch Beyonce singing some shit about how she can see Haiti’s halo. Um, are you fucking serious? Haiti with a halo?! HA! It becomes quite obvious that none of these morons know anything at all about the history of Haiti and I can bet they are all pretty damn glad they never have to go to that forsaken little shithole.

On the same note, where the fuck was everyone when Haiti was screaming for help years ago? Again, does anyone know the history of this country and the shit they have had to deal with for years and years? Where were all the bleeding hearts then? That country has been fucked for a long time and only now that a few buildings were knocked down do people even notice and pretend to care. And believe me, they will care only as long as it takes for CNN to tell everyone what the next big thing.. er, tragedy is.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad if these people actually deserved help. Seems to be how people like this work though. Tragedy strikes and what do they do? Go on a looting spree! This aspect isn’t being talked about that much though because you can’t very well feel sorry for those who, after such a tragic event, decide the best thing to do is walk around the streets wielding machetes, committing acts of violence, murder, rape and decide to loot anything they can find. Those poor, poor Haitians. Personally I think we should encourage this. Instead of dropping food or sending money we should instead send ammunition, machetes and maybe a few hand grenades. Let them wipe each other out and finish it. Will save us money in the long run.

I suppose some good will come out of all this. Americans will lose some money and resources, the rest of the world will still hate us and condemn us for trying to help (heh, France is already up in arms about this), and Madonna and Angelina Jolie will get to adopt a few more 3rd world babies to add to their collections.

In closing… fuck Haiti.